On Motivation and Being Positive

A couple of weeks ago (was it all the way back in WINTER? GAH, where have the first 5 months of 2015 gone???), Margie mentioned a quote by Pharrell...about motivation and hearing 'No'. And I made her a meme and now I'm sharing it with you guys, even though she didn't *technically* give me permission because...well, it kind of goes along with my post today.

The gist of the quote is that no should be a great motivator and not something that leaves us lying on the floor like a puddle of goo.

I've been really...unsettled...lately. Partially because I'm knee-deep in a rough draft and partially because I have a new project out on submission and partially because I have another project I'm trying to breath new life into. I don't want to hear no on any of these projects because I have poured my heart into them. I love the characters, I love the themes and tropes and I do think these next books will be the best I've written.

And that is scary. Because what if The Best I've Written translates into The Best I Can Write, Everything After This Will Be Dreck?

Yesterday my sister-in-law, who is one of the most positive people I have ever known, shared an inspiring article on Facebook, about negative self-talk. The article was geared toward runners, but as I read it I had a little ah-ha moment. Because I'm guilty of the negative self-talk thing. Very, very guilty. I am incredibly hard on myself, to the point that some days I seriously feel like it's better to completely avoid writing or teaching or ... pretty much anything because I'm afraid my efforts won't be 'good enough'. Good enough for whom? I have no idea.

As I was reading that article I thought about all the ways I tell myself 'no' - I remind myself that if a project isn't liked by a certain publisher 'I can always self-publish', as if self-publishing is somehow less than traditional...I tell myself that I can't sign up for charity bike rides because I'll never be able to push that 20 mile mark. There are more, but this post is getting wordy and...there I go, telling myself no again.

So I'm adding a new word on to my Word of the Year list. That word is Yes ~ yes, I can sign up for that bike ride because who cares if I don't make the full 20 miles, I'll go as far as I can. Yes, I can self-publish a project, not because it's less worthy than something on the NYT list but because I believe in it enough to take a chance. And, yes, I can let no be a motivator...I can let 'no' push me to be more than I think I can be...because, really, those boundaries I've imagined don't have to be boundaries at all.

Comments

  1. An excellent post, Kristi. I suppose we are passive-agressive with ourselves when we do this, aren't we? As far as words of the year go, Yes is an excellent one!

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    1. Thanks, Liz! And, yeah, passive-aggressive is a good way to describe it. Glad you like my additional word. :D

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  2. Love the meme and this post. "Yes" is a great word for the year. How often do we limit ourselves with negative talk and fear of failure. Good for you!

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    1. Thanks, Carolyn! Hope your week is going well!

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  3. Yes! I like that. Just say yes.

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    1. PS--love your meme and so glad you got to share it with everyone :)

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    2. :) I'm saying it again - YES! :D

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