Friday, January 14

Fear of the Closet Monster

I refuse to sleep next to the closet in a bedroom. And if the door is open, I will not let my hubby rest until he closes it. He calls it fear of the closet monster. I know it sounds childish, but hey, we all have our quirks. Some people find clowns creepy, I hate dark places with open doors. I know there is no monster, but there's something unsettling to me about an open closet door when it's dark.

Another fear of mine? Being in a room full of accomplished and/or experienced writers. Put me in a room full of business executives and I'm fine, will talk a person's ear off. Put me in a room full of editors, agents, and writers, just the thought of it makes me break out into a cold sweat. Why? Because there's always the worry in the back of my head that I can't do this. I won't write a good story, I won't sell. And I will never measure up. Sometimes, I want to throw my hands in the air and surrender.

That's when the stubborn part of me,takes over. It won't let me throw my hands up. Won't let me close my laptop and never open it again. Won't let the me forget the ideas running through my head. That part of me knows that the thought of never writing again is scarier to me than the closet monster.

11 comments:

  1. You go, stubborn girl. Did you have siblings like mine who used to hide in a closet, and when I least expected it, they would jump out screaming? Scared the bejeebers out of me.

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  2. I am with you. If the bedroom door is open, I can't sleep. I'm afraid someone will walk in during the night and I won't hear them opening the door. Jeez, boys shouldn't cry and adults shouldn't be afraid of closet monsters - Not True :0

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  3. Hey Em! I think I just watched too many scary movies when I was younger. Of course, someone sneaking up behind me scares me to death!

    Hi Doree! LOL! Thanks for stopping by. I don't think there's anything creepier than a door creaking open while you're in bed.

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  4. Shawn~
    I'm afraid of the dark. Really. Live out in the country where everyting is dark and see how fun that is. I love it here, but it's scary at night.
    You don't have anything to fear when it comes to writing. You're very good, and I'll be proud to say I knew you when.

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  5. I think everyone needs a little stubborn in them, Shawn! Go you for embracing it - and using stubborn to keep going.

    Went to see 'Little Fockers' last night with the DH and we saw a preview for a new Scream movie (#4, I think). Scary movies scare me. I can't watch 'em at the theatre 'coz it's dark. Can't watch them at home *after* dark or alone. Thrillers? Love 'em. Action-packed gore? Give it to me. Scary movies? I run and hide (but not in a closet, that Scream guy might be there!).

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  6. Hey there Kristi! I love thrillers, romance(of course) sci- fi, and love stories. The only time I go to see scary movies is when it's hubby's turn to pick. The movie Candy Man scared be to death!

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  7. I think you're on to something. The fears that we know aren't real, like the closet monster, I think are easier to deal with. It is those bone deep fears that whisper, you aren't good enough. This fear keeps me searching the web, shopping, and blogging about nothing instead of writing.
    I have written two books, but I still feel like I may not be able to make the magic happen again. Maybe I'm all tapped out? It is those fears that keep me up at night.
    When you figure out the solution let me know!

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  8. KC,
    The only solution I've come up with so far is to keep trying. Treat those fears of not being good enough like you would a closet monster. They're not real.

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  9. I'm afraid of water. And snakes and spiders. I pretend I just don't like them, but actually I'm scared of them.

    Took me years to be able to sleep with a closed bedroom door, but I never thought about why.

    Now I have to think...

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