Mushy Mind...



...and wow, is it bad right now! I have a dreadful case of mind mush—my ability to focus and function is seriously out of whack. I’m not sure if it’s because the weather is so cold again or that the post-holiday time is upon us or that I’m just home from two weeks of travel, but for some reason, my brain is muddled. I suspect it mostly has to do with the death of my sister two weeks ago. Fact is, I’m just not able to focus on much of anything right now. My grandmother used to say she was muzzy—isn’t that a great word? I’m muzzy.

Example 1: I went back in the house twice this morning before I finally took off for my errands. Once to make sure I’d unplugged all the hair stuff in the bathroom (I had) and then again to get a heavier jacket because, duh! I forgot it wasn’t 75 degrees outside. Then I pulled out of the garage, shut the door, and went down the drive. At the end of the driveway, I thought, “Did I shut the garage door?” So I backed up and checked to see that it was down. (It was.) Then before I took off, I had to consider whether or not I’d turned off the coffeepot, but fortunately, before I made a third trek back into the house, I remembered that I didn’t make coffee this morning. See? Muzzy.

Example 2: I finally got on the road, headed to the north end for my bimonthly (Is that every two months? Because that’s what I’m going for here.) trip to Costco. The drive was uneventful, but once I got parked, I couldn’t find my list. Now, you don’t want to go to Costco without a list because if you do, you’ll end up with lots of stuff you never intended to buy. I emptied my purse on the front seat of the car, looked in all my pockets, and was just about to give it up and try to recreate the list on a napkin from Starbucks when I remembered that said list was in my phone. I’d made it there on my memo app because I’m really bad about losing lists… Phone was in my pocket, I was good to go.

Example 3: Last one, I promise, and it’s simple and easy. I forgot I needed to review an edit that I did for a client—an edit that’s due, um… tomorrow! So that’s my afternoon—going over the edits to Liz Kelly’s manuscript.

This isn’t aging. It’s life stuff getting in the way of…well… my life. You know what? I think I need to start writing every day again. Amidst all the other muzziness in my head, characters are milling about, trying to get their story out. I’ve got the revisions on the third Women of Willow Bay book to finish up, while the fourth is on scraps of paper that are clipped together and riding around in my laptop bag. When I’m writing, my life feels more organized, whether it really is or not. Plus tomorrow, I’m back to my regular winter three-days-a-week pool schedule—swimming can only help too, right?

Because this isn’t aging… right?

I didn’t have a mushy mind picture to share, so you get Grandboy because we just came home from visiting him and he’s adorable, and one of Sis because she’s gone and I miss her so much I can hardly breathe, but she’d be the first to tell me to “snap out of it!”

Comments

  1. I've been there far more often than I'd choose! Things will calm soon, though, and you'll be back on track. Writing every day is a good thing, even if it's something you may not be able to use--it still grounds you.

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    1. I do hope so, Liz. I miss writing, but more, I miss the motivation to write. Hugs, baby!

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  2. I get the muzzies every now and then, too (and *my* great-grandma used to use that word!)...usually it's when I'm going-going too much and not giving myself a little time to decompress. Like Liz, I think you'll work through it...and writing those characters down is always a good idea!

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    1. Thanks, Kristi! I'm even having a hard time getting on the Internet--I'm sure it's grief mostly. And muzzy is a grand word! It sounds like exactly what it is. ;-)

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  3. I hate mushy mind days. When I feel like I'm having one, I stay home, if that's possible.

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    1. Good idea, Chrys. Staying home on the cold January days always feels just right. I'm thinking coffee and my Kindle because I've got Kristina Knight's new book waiting for me!

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  4. My family would tell you I get the muzzies--love that word--all the time. They don't call me Susan Meyer because I look like Teri Hatcher but because I'm kind of over-my-head and maybe, more likely, distracted by the things in my head...

    Hugs to you during this difficult time and I say, open a new page, start a book..writing never hurts and usually helps.


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