Sometimes We Do What We Gotta Do. . .



. . . even when we don’t want to do it. This week is one of those times. I’m tired of working. I’m out of the mood, I’m burned out, I’m over it. I want to stop. I’ve worked hard most of the last few months, even at the lake–something I really try to avoid doing. But, I have deadlines and lovely clients who pay me to get their project done. So, I’ll keep at it.

It’s odd to feel this way when I love my job as much as I do. I know exactly how fortunate I am to be able to earn what mostly constitutes a living while sitting at home in my jammies. I’m aware that I’m very blessed not having to go out each morning and drive through rush-hour traffic to get to a sterile office somewhere. Most people would envy me and no doubt get very snarky when I whine. I wouldn’t blame them, but even the best job in the world can get tiresome.

Most of all, right now, I want to write and when I’m on a tight deadline or have several projects going, that’s hard to do. I edit all day, taking one or two quick breaks for lunch and maybe a fast jaunt on the treadmill. I have supper with Husband and then come back to my office to keep working. By the time my eyes are so bleary I can no longer see, it’s too late to write. I go to bed, get a few hours’ sleep, and start all over again.

This past week, our kids were here and I actually took time away from everything to spend time in the lake, on the lake, and just playing with Grandboy, Son, and DIL. It was great! It helped. Yesterday, I finished up IGO judging after I took time out to feed my spirit at church. One day this week, I’ll take a break and go with Dee for a mani/pedi, which will also make life nicer. But, when my work schedule is like this, I start perseverating over my novels and right now, I have to sit on my hands to keep from bugging the agent and editors who currently have them. Is anyone showing even a shred of interest in publishing them? Will I ever be able to be simply a writer? Can I ever make a living that way?

I think the answer to that is probably, no. The highly successful, very well-paid novelist is a rare bird. Most of the published romance novelists I know have day jobs, so I know that I’m not alone. But sometimes, it depresses me when I have to set my writing aside for a few days to earn a living, and it’s been more than just a few days since I’ve written a word. Poor Nan! It’s a sad, sad tale, isn’t it?

Well, this project is almost finished, the next one isn’t due for another few days, so I can write again soon. Plus, in less than a month, Liz and I will be on our way to the 2016 Michigan writing trip--another very good thing! In the meantime, I’m making notes and recording thoughts on my phone as I think about how I want my newest story to progress, plus, I’m taking time out to whine right now! All in all, I’m very lucky . . . and I do know it. Honest!

Comments

  1. We are the luckiest of people. Sometimes we just have to be reminded--by ourselves! :-)

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  2. Aw, Nan, I really do feel your pain...even though we are truly blessed to be able to do what we do for a living, there are moments when it seems as if we don't get enough time to do it.

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    1. Too bad we don't have more hours in the day, Kristi, but maybe I just need to be a better time manager? Or stop worrying overmuch about the whole earning-a-living thing? ;-)

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  3. I get whiny if I don't get to write. Or, my family might say, bitchy. LOL Especially if I haven't had time to at least jot down a bit of dialogue or dream a scene.Sharing the pain..

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    1. Thanks, Margie! As you can see, not writing makes me crabby too!

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  4. Nan, my heart breaks for you that you don't have time to write!! And go ahead and whine about being overly busy... Just because we got it better than others (which will *always* be the case, no matter what)doesn't mean we're not allowed to be frustrated and overwhelmed. If it makes you feel better, no one ever seems to feel sorry for me when I complain about the trials of having to drink wine first thing in the morning for my day job. ;-)

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    1. Ava, baby, I feel very sorry for you for having to drink wine first think in the morning. How terrible! ;-) Thanks for the sympathy--I know I have it better than most, but I just wish there wasn't the need for the day job. Soon...well, not soon really, but someday, I can focus entirely on writing. ;-)

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