Life In Balance

by Margie Senechal

Every year, about this time, I go through this dance with Nanowrimo. "Should I or shouldn't I?" "Will I or won't I?" "Can I or can't I?"

So, last week I sat down to write a pro and con list. However, the list got a little argumentative--as in the con side sounded a bit like a snarky devil on my shoulder.

Pro: I could focus on something new.
Con: But, will you?

Pro:I have my schedule a month in advance so I can plan my writing time.
Con: Writing time? (evil laughter)

Pro: I think I really want to do this.
Con: Sure, you say that now,but are you going to be saying that in the middle of November when it gets tough???

I told you it got snarky.

If I were to actually sit down and write one up, I'd have to say that completing/winning Nano would be on my bucket list. Right up there with riding in an air balloon or visiting a real castle.

The good thing about Nano being on my bucket list is that: A) It's cheap. B) It's in my control. And C) I'm sure there's something I'm forgetting.

But--BUT--I want to win Nano legitimately. Meaning I don't want to get to 50K by not using contractions or inserting the lyrics to entire songs just to beef up my numbers. I can't just put down words on paper just to win an imaginary award.

All that said, I am still in contemplation. I thought about writing a book with a new seedling but I think it needs to take root before I fiddle with it. And Ana of the suitcases is refusing to go quietly into the night for 30 days while I focus on a new, shiny project.

On the con side--work. I'm about to jump on the train to retail hell or you know, holidays to the rest of you. This year we are doing these Christmas shops and of course, I volunteered to take on this massive project which begins on Novemeber 1. Yeah, that should tell me something right there. While I'm looking forward to this challenge, it will be time-consuming--not just in work but also in creative juices.

And then there's the holidaze. I love going to bazaars in November on Saturdays, vegging out to the new TV shows, and going to Oscar-bait movies that start to appear in theaters. That's a lot of distraction.

But, I have 15K invested in Ana's story and if I win Nano at 50K, I'd have the first draft of my book about complete.

But, again, I know me. If I'm exhausted, I will go home after work, change into pj's, and park myself on the couch. Do not pass go. Do not collect 1670 words.

After all this, I'm still in a quandary. Five days and counting...